September 30, 2008

lazy?..

well, im back after an interesting weekend in Seattle. But, I dont have time to update right now. just thought i would say something and not slack entirely..

Got home late Sunday night, worked for almost 11 hours yesterday, and now I have laid in bed for too long this morning and still have to get ready to go to work. I had wanted to walk in today, and take advantage of the last few days of decent weather we have been granted, but I dont know that I'll have time.. Maybe I will anyways, just cause..

I also didnt take many pictures this weekend. I think there are 3. But I'll put them up. Later.

Right now, I have to do something with my hair and get on the road. Maybe head to a motorcycle shop or two this evening, find the boots I'm after...

September 26, 2008

what the..

i dont know where the weeks go anymore.... but anyways, i have stuffs to update about but no time right now. and im off to Seattle tonight to see Nicole again.. so I wont be updating all weekend. Sorry!

But I'll be back.. with pictures.... promise!

September 24, 2008

wtf

After reading Amalie's entry yesterday about Finland, I see this on yahoo news.

What goes on??

work work work

I was at work for 11 hours yesterday. In the end, I was just visiting with people. Nice for that little bit of wind down, thats for sure. What a shit show the end of yesterday was... ugh.

I have a meeting today after work with the head guy of a smaller studio in town. A friend at work knows him very well and sent him my resume. I still really want my company to come through and hire me on full time. Would look way better on my resume, but if this place will pay me enough... I dont know. I dont even know what exactly they are looking for. I do know that they know what my job is now, and that they are a small studio of like, 20 people or so. So I can do alot for them, and probably still be bored. We shall see I guess.

It is still so cold in my house. Even colder this morning. When I got into bed last night I was shivering and chattering my teeth. Not cool for my home. It is 65 F/18 C in here now. Way to cold for me. Gah. Time for a hot shower!

In other news, everyone is going on about heroes, and I think that maybe I should start watching it...

September 22, 2008

brrrr

its also freakin freezing in my house. i have the thermostat turned up over 15 degrees higher than what it reads as the temp in here, and my heaters are not even warm. the resident manager is going to come and look at it tomorrow, and maybe crank up the furnace in the building.

i hate hate hate being cold. and i am freeeeeezing right now. adds to my being miserable.

yay!..............

ho hum

If you are looking for a fun and interesting post, please read no further. This is of the more serious (and potentially whiny) variety. I am feeling rather blah these past few days, and yes, perhaps its partly due to the onset of winter weather (clouds and rain) but its also my life. And where its going. So if you aren't into reading about me blathering on about personal stuff, then stop now and come back when I am more perky. Otherwise, don't say I didnt warn you...

The better part of the last week I have felt down. I may even go so far as to say depressed. I know a number of factors are at work here.

Definately always on my mind is the fact that time is ticking away faster than I want it to. The fact that almost every day someone else asks me when I am leaving is a constant reminder that I need to stay on track with what I want to get done before the big move.

I am going to miss my family terribly. Especially my Mom. And my Grandma. And my new nephew. My friends... well, sure i'll miss them, but im a hermit so I mostly talk to them online anyways.. so that wont change. And there are new friends to be had. But it weighs on me that I am here in Vancouver where none of my family is, and I am not going to have a huge amount of time to see them before I go. so once. maybe twice.

And then there is my job. I need to stay on longer than the middle of november, which is when my contract currently expires. pretty much to ensure that i stay on til the end of march, when I want it to, i will need to be hired on full time. i have some really great people rooting for me and trying their best to get me on. and i am very very greatful for that. i also feel like crap cause im going to turn around in less than six months and quit and basically throw everything away that they are working towards for me right now. sure i can take my skills with me to new jobs abroad, but i cant help but feel like im betraying them. curse my compassion and conscience. i know its what i have to do, in order to leave though, so its what will be.

I love my job. love love love love love it. and i could see myself growing into it further, learning so much more about a field that i never in a million years thought i would be a part of. i didnt even consider it. i love the team so much. i finally have the makings of a carreer that i could love and really get behind. and it tears me apart and troubles me to no end that i have to give it up and go.

The flip side of this great job is that it is the only thing i love about being here. being in Vancouver, being in Canada, being where i am in my life. I *need* to make this move. i need to go figure out what it is that my life has in store for me. even if it sends me right back here again, i will have that experience with me, and the knowledge and wisdom from it. oh but the fear of never finding this magical job again. i know i know, i found it once i can do it again. hell, i can look for work in the same damn field. it just scares me. what if im giving up something great that i cant find again. what if what if, screw the what ifs.

This is just a continual loop in my head. No wonder i didnt sleep well last night.

Im sure ill come back to this very topic again, as i have somewhat lots of time before i move. so ill leave that be for now.

The other thing that has me down right now, and i dont know if its just because im finishing being hormonal and that there was a full moon.. who knows. i just know that im feeling very lonely right now, and that is not like me. i have been alone alot for almost 5 years now, and i am totally ok with it. sure, it would be super to have someone to spend time with, and lord knows i have a ton of love to give, and am pretty keen on receiving it, but i am also content knowing that its not a good time in my path in life to get involved right now. it would complicate things, and i really need to know who i am before i go tangling someone else up in it all.

but right now. man. i want someone. i am having all these wild crushes on super great guys at work, who are busy being awesome friends to me (which wont change i assure you, and i wont do anything to boycott it) and then i find that they have girlfriends and im actually hurt. like, nothing was happening anyways, so why dont you be a little more crazy corey. honestly. i am letting my emotions take off like i havent done in ages. it makes me really want to get somewhere so i can settle down and go on a damn date. or just kiss someone! i could really use a good make out, thats for sure... ugh.

so there you have it. my vulnerable side that doesnt come out much. and really, with my old blog it never really did. but thats why i moved this here. so that i would feel more comfortable to get out the things that i need to. this is going to take up the whole damn page.... but enough is enough. ill go eat something, and chat with my mom online and try not to be impatient and snippy with her, even though she drives me nuts. and tomorrow ill go to work and go for coffee with bill, who is a dreamboat and so nice and is trying his best to help me stay on. i could squeeze him to bits. all my boys at work. arg. i wish i could just cry and let it all out but i cant. whats up with that?

/END SADNESS HOLY CRAP
gad.

September 20, 2008

damn rain

So much for my yard sale today. Its pouring. Im thinking about just renting a table at the flea market for a weekend and just trying to get rid of everything. For any price, I dont even care. Just get out of my house! Ugh. I am so ready too.

At least when I was taking apart my storage room last night I got rid of some huge boxes that were just taking up space. Some of my house may seem empty after I get rid of it all, but oh well. I think it will feel nice. A good start to living minimally since thats where i'll be for a while when I get over there.

Just have to figure out how to get 4 or 5 boxes to Denmark, and what to do with them when I get there. Or, if I have them sent over later, what to do with them here....

September 19, 2008

yay for ebay!

I won this book last night on ebay












It totally takes me back about 24 years. I want the rest of his books too.
At least the ones I remember well.
And the seller for this is in Coquitlam (Which is part of Greater Vancouver) so it shouldnt take long to get to me!!!
I am so excited to get it!

September 17, 2008

my feet

And finally, without further ado... my feet by Heather McLean (toes by Mark Ainsworth)














I'll try to get a better shot another time. Hard to get a good one of your own feet...

buttons!

Amalie! here is the book I told you of. There are so many great pictures in here for crafts. My only sadness is that we will lose the ones on the backside of whatever we choose. Unless we get some laser copies first... hmmmmm













vancouver

Decided to take some pictures walking home yesterday. I do this walk alot, but have never taken pics. I'll miss my walk. I should get my butt out of bed in the morning and do it more often.

I walk over the Cambie bridge there and back. This is the view east off of it.









A closer view of the science centre. So much fun!









I love these little ferries that take you across False Creek to wherever you need to go. My Mom loves them too.









And who doesnt love watching the dog park?












View West.









Looking South from the middle












And back North again.












Once I cross the bridge I go up this side street to avoid the noise of the traffic.












Some graffiti along the way.









Loads of beautiful tree lined streets as I make my way up the hills through the residential parts.












I love this bike decoration. There are little white christmas lights all over it. This street is actually quite amazing at night.









More gorgeous tree lined streets.












Finally, my street. And my building on the very right hand side of the shot.









There's my house! top floor. And yes, my christmas lights are up year round. I even turn them on randomly. Like, maybe tomorrow night. (I'll get a shot if you ask nicely)

full moon?

call me hormonal but i have the biggest crushes on a few boys at work. just something to pass the time and daydream about. or maybe i just need to find someone to make out with. that would be pretty alright. i try to stay out of any dating/relationships right now since im leaving. and for that reason, i want to get there already so i can start it up. man alive.

should i?

so a friend had someone cancel on him, and now has an extra ticket to Alice Cooper and wants me to go. to be honest, i dont really care if i see that show or not. it would be fun sure, and no id never have the chance to go again (cause i would never buy tickets) but its also my night for tai chi, and i missed it last week.

i think i will tell him to see if he cant find someone that actually loves alice cooper, and if not, then ill go... i feel very meh about it...

September 16, 2008

what really grinds my gears

you know what really grinds my gears?

When there is something that you want/need to do, but cant get to right away, and someone says 'well, i guess if you really wanted it then you would do it/it would happen'.

you know what? if i *didn't* really want it, i wouldn't even fake the effort. just because i don't drop everything else in my life to do it right this second, doesn't make me want it any less, so eff you and your closed mindedness. maybe some of us have a life, or at the very least a life-balance going on, so that we cant just do everything the second if flits into our minds.

just mind your own business and keep your snotty comments to yourself. or ill show you what i really want to do....

September 15, 2008

new hur

Lysa and i just spent an hour uploading our faces into websites and trying on new hair styles. She's been toying with cutting her dreads off. I just wondered about super short hair.

Well. I wonder no more. I'll keep it long thanks. So bad..

i heart sleeping

Another late morning. My alarm had me awake at 6:30 am. I just got out of bed. its 8:30 am. Oops. I would just rather stay in bed...

Weekend went by in a blur. The whole last week actually. Oh, and August. I feel like it should be Wednesday for some reason. Probably cause I havent had a day off for a week now. Come on Saturday! My day off and yard sale day! They are forecasting a bit of rain for that day, but I know how the weatherpeople are at predicting that. They suck. So I hope it wont be all that bad. It's pretty much the only day I have to just get rid of stuff. Not making me any money lurking in my storage room. Fingers crossed on that one.

I really wish I had gotten up on time now. I could have walked to work. I guess i better get ready and I can at least walk to the train station. I still need to get my act together and go get my learners license for motorcycles. I've been slacking on that for a few weeks. I could have done that this morning as well. Maybe tomorrow. Or at lunch...

September 14, 2008

I miss Lysa

Had a nice day today. Work was fun. I seriously love my job. *sigh*

Met up with Lysa and Nicole afterwards, and Lysa came over to my house. She left for dinner for a couple hours and came back, and we went through all her stuff that had been in storage at my house for a year or so. Lots of memories for her, and lots of fun pictures for me to see. (Yes, Dave, you were even in one!)

It's been super fun having her here and being able to spend some time and just chatter and catch up. I love her to bits and I do hope that I can see her again before I go over yonder.

No new pics of her and I just yet, but here is an older one for ya.

September 12, 2008

finally friday

This week has gone by quickly, but not quick enough. And with my chest hurting so much, i've been slow to get going. every. morning.

like today for instance. normally id be close to work right now. but im still at home, have to brush my teeth, think about some makeup, find the right set of plugs to wear today. (Im wearing my 'I heart nerds' shirt).

Lysa is in town and Danielle is having a girls night for her today! Cant wait!! there will be pictures for sure! but when will they be posted? that... is the question.

September 10, 2008

its scientific!

3 new posts!

well 4 if you include this one. Im caught up now.
go see my pictures. comment and enjoy.
or not.

I got nuthin

I dont know why I dont just update. I mean, I have things to say, but I feel like I have to wait til I get the pictures up that are owed. I guess I can always post the pics later... I'll get this figured out sooner or later.

Work is crazy busy still. And im super sore with my healing implants and whatnot. Slow going but going none the less. Still have to wait to hear about when my contract is being extended until, but my insiders tell me that by the end of next week all will be revealed. Sounds very mystical, but hey, its all I have to go one.

I had a great moment with a coworker today. She has been talking to me about tattoos a bit since I started, and about how she wanted to get one herslf. (And no, not the annoying sort of conversations, actually good ones). She is about my Moms age, so its fun. Anyways, she went and got her little celtic knot thing, and its pretty good. Tasteful. She told me she's been thinking about doing this for about 6-7 years, and after meeting me, it really inspired her to go and do it and she is so happy now. She says it feels right. I like that I can be credited with a part of that.

Anywho, lots more goes on but im tired. oh so tired.

Oh, Nicole pierced my high nostrils when I was in Seattle so I'm healing those too. Good times!!!

seattle fun times

Headed down to Seattle last weekend for a quick visit.
Nicole was up from Florida doing a guest spot for a month. She moves up in January!!
Too bad I leave soon after, but we're planning a big road trip.
I hope it works out! It would be super fun to do before I skip outta this continent!

Here we are at Deep Roots where she is working in Seattle














Leslie dropped in to say hello! I only see her every six months or so, so it was super great to see her too!














Nicole and I again..














The real reason I was headed to Seattle was that Steve (left) was in town, and I needed him to fix my subdermal implants. Had to jump on the opportunity of him being close by, instead of my going back down to Albequerque, NM. I am so happy with them now!!!

Wade from Oz was there too. Hadnt seen him in over a year either.
We had some air to clear between us so I'm really glad he was there and we had that chance to talk and hang out.

It was a super great weekend!














Nicole then drove me back up to Canada and spent Monday with me.
We drove around and looked at crazy crackheads, and then got slurpees (Canadian ones are so much better than American ones) and ate mini cupcakes by English Bay. So rad.

Calgary pictures (finally)

Ok. Some pics. I didnt take as many as I thought.. and I'm waiting for some peeps to post some more..

First up, my good friend Kristin and I at the ship. She is like a long lost sister or something..



















This is Kristin and her boyfriend Corey. They are crazy.














Terry!



















My best friend Holly!














Sweet Christine came down from Edmonton!














We ate at tubby dog. mmmm veggie dogs!
Mine is on the left, and its called the A-bomb.
its covered in cheese and chips!! so yummy but hard to eat!














This here is Heather who tattooed my feet!
I dont think Ive posted pictures of them...



















This is Siobhan and Cohen, whom I drove out with.
We stopped in Banff and the candy store was closed!
Bum deal...















Not too exciting but maybe i'll find some more later...

September 5, 2008

when good blogs go bad

so i already know that i need to give you pictures from calgary. and they are even on my computer as i type this. right. now. but.... im too tired to do them right now...
and tomorrow im off to seattle til sunday night, which means ill have more pictures to horde away from you.
ill post them. someday.
getting my subdermal implants removed and replaced. or some of them anyways. so that they will be in a straight line now. so excited!
ill have lots of bloody picture, dont you worry!!!

September 4, 2008

back at it

I need to update more about the convention, and post some pictures, but I havent had the energy to get them off of my camera yet, and truth be told, I was pretty lazy with picture taking. You think of it all after the fact.

Back at work yesterday, I heard that the lady I am covering for is now not coming back until November. Up until this time, I thought she was going to be back on Oct 6, and my contract was up on Oct 3. Now that she is returning in November, I actually had to chase my managers around to ask them what was going on with me. I've been told now that I'll be extended, but they haven't told me until when.

I guess its great that they are doing that, but I'd rather them just either decide once and for all when they are going to extend me til, or just hire me on full time. (I'll just quit later anyways). It's very tiring just never knowing what I am going to do. Hopefully today I can at least get an answer on when my contract goes until now.

September 1, 2008

home now please?

Convention has been fun-o-rama. Last day today. Hung out a bit, and now Im going to go join some friends at Bushido for the last after party. Met a guy from Montreal who does guest spots in Sweden quite a bit, and also doesnt drink. Nice to find someone else I may run into often in my new end of the world.

Breakfast this morning was good. My grandma looks good for 94, or a least as good as you can look. Then my Mom and I went to see Mamma Mia. Again. And I cried. Again. Fun times. Love that movie. Would love to see the theatre preformance more.

Ok. Im tired. Going out just cause. Driving home all day tomorrow.
I cant wait for my own bed.